The “Yes, But What Do I Write Down?” Dilemma

How to Be Successful

We've all seen posts and articles like, “How to Be Successful”. Of course, we read them because we all want to be successful (I believe that there is a chair on a beach in Fiji that has my name on it).

So, you click the post/article/whatever and you get this advice:

• Provide value to the company

• Build good relationships

• Communicate effectively

And the comments under the post are like:

• “Great list!”

• “Very helpful!”

• “Wonderful insight!”

You go back to your desk thinking, “ok I need to provide value to the company, build good relationships, and communicate effectively”.

But, when you try to do those things, you realize that you have no clue how to actually DO any of those things.

You may think to yourself, “everyone says that this is a great list, what’s wrong with me that I can’t figure out how to do these things?”.

Nothing Is Wrong With You

The answer is: nothing is wrong with you. The problem is with the list!

Don’t get me wrong, these are all good things to aspire to, but there is really no practical advice in that list at all.

The Dilemma

I call this the “Yes, But What Do I Write Down?” dilemma. This is for when you get lots of theories that sound great, but nobody actually gives you any practical or specific advice on how to put those theories into practice.

I coined this term at a previous company when I had some questions. I kept asking various consultants and experts and they kept giving me theory. Finally, I was like, “what do I need to write down? How do I actually do this thing that you are telling me about?!” Because even after all those discussions, I still had no idea.

I believe in practical advice, and this can apply to many places in your life. Ever had a performance review that said, “communicate more clearly with peers”? Ok, that is good advice, but what does that look like? What did I say/do/write that was not clear? How do I implement this advice?

This kind of generic advice is very easy to share. It gets people likes and clicks and engagement. It helps your manager get through your performance review quickly. But, it doesn’t help you at the end of the day.

Practical Advice

Since this article is about practical advice, I will give you the practical advice that the other post didn’t.

Provide Value to the Company

Try to understand what value looks like for the company. Watch, listen, and learn from leadership to identify what they consider valuable (or, you could even ask them!).

• Is it money?

• Prestige?

• A strong and collaborative team?

• Innovation?

• Something else?

Once you figure out what the organization values, then you can figure out the next step of how to do that thing. If it’s money, work your network to bring in a new client. If it’s innovation, then hit the drawing board and come up with some new ideas.

Build Good Relationships

Aim to be trustworthy and reliable. Have your coworkers’ backs. Say good things about them in meetings whether they are there or not. Share credit. Seek their advice. Give them something of value (goes back to item 1!). Don’t betray their confidences. Don’t throw them under the bus!

It takes time to build good relationships and for people to trust you, but it is worth the investment.

Communicate Effectively

This one is a little tougher, mostly because communication be can be very nuanced. There are lots of books out there that can teach you about it, and we can talk more about it in a later post, but my practical advice is:

• Tailor your message to the audience. Put yourself in their shoes and ask yourself if you would understand what you said if you were them.

• Don’t use industry jargon when talking to someone who wouldn’t understand (the typical engineer talking to the salesperson situation).

• Be polite and professional. It is crazy that I have to say this, but I have been on the receiving end of some beauties. Once, someone didn’t like what I was requesting in my email and responded “Ignored”.

Don't Feel Badly

Don’t feel badly if vague advice doesn’t help you. It doesn’t really help anyone. And don’t let people in your life do this to you either.

• Ask for specifics.

• Ask them “what does that look like to you?”

• Ask them “when did that happen before?”

Otherwise, you really have no idea how to course correct.

While the original poster’s heart was in the right place, the practical application was lacking. They should go back and read this article!